The Human Body is Disgusting

Is there such a shade as “light black?” I ask because that was the color of what came out of my nose this morning. There was not even a hint of green nor a shade of yellow. A few hours later the colors changed to bright orange, deep purple, green-blue. What’s most disgusting is [...]

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Dirty Dirty Santa II

“Mommy,” I said.
“What you want?” she yelled back.
“Today, at the mall Santa touched me on my danger zone.”
“What the hell you talkin’ bout fool?”
“You know–my danger zone…”
“Who the hell told you to go to the mall anyway?”
“But mommy, he was sweaty and dirty and made me (whispering) say nasty things.”
“Bring your ass over here. I’m [...]

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Have a Dirty Christmas/I Am Queen of the Non Sequitur

My sister posed a hypothetical to me the other day: Would you rather cuddle nude all night next to George W. Bush while he talks to himself, or would you rather cuddle up next to soggy-assed Richard Simmons? We talked about Santa and I confessed my secret fantasy to have sex with him in his [...]

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If I were in the Garden of Eden

Look outside the window. There is war. There is death. There is genocide. A holocaust raging from the southwest to central Africa. Millions being tortured because of who they pray to. The American middle class is disappearing. Globalization is on its way. And what are we doing? Drinking tall latte cafe decaf low fat with [...]

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Why Hipsters are Kewl (with a capital “K”)

…Because they stick together like sushi rice. Who is a hipster? After the whole grunge phase, there was an entire generation of individuals who had anger but who also had developed a strong affinity to the hipsters of the 40s and 50s. Mostly, these kids thought that Buddy Holly’s was the ideal look. They also [...]

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Singin’ a New Song

Today, I wrote a new song. I think it’s fantabulous and my panel of listeners would agree. Primarily because they are invisible and if they don’t I’ll make their asses disappear. The song is called “Stalk you ’til I get some dick.” I would classify it as a punk/indie rock song. Here are some of [...]

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Expectation and Disappointment

Disappointment and expectation are first cousins. The thing is that they were both bred incestuously so they have that inbred look about them. You’ll know it when it walks into the room. Believe me it is a look that goes beyond the description of words and one that you will never forget.
The less you [...]

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How to Make Friends

Lately, I have been experiencing something foreign to me–the longing to be convivial with people whose company I enjoy. I have finally begun to understand why people need people. I live with my lover who is 20+ years my senior. There are 2 or 3 individuals who are very close to me. They [...]

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April 10 March for Dignity

I walked and saw those beautiful brown faces. The ones that fix my toilets, the ones who build the homes we live in. In thousands they showed up. My mother and father, aunts, uncles, and other distant relatives they are lucky immigrants. Many of them were not as lucky. Guatemala, Mexico, Korea, Peru, Dominican Republic, [...]

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Faith

Belief, makes things real.
Makes things feel, feel alright.
Belief, makes things true.
Things like you, you and I.
Tonight, you arrested my mind.
When you came to my defense.
With a knife in the shape of your mouth,
in the form of your body, with the wrath of a god.
Oh, you stood by me, Belief
Builds from scratch.
Doesn’t have to relax, it [...]

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